i am so easy to love. i lived my life and i know, when i go to some place new, meet new ppl, i become like a magnet to others. im not boasting or being egoistic, but i know, i do have something likeable in me. i just find it so hard to give my heart to someone, esp someone i cant have feelings for. yes they will keep my heart better than those i love more, but.. i just cant.. give my love away like that.
its been my problem since i was 13. thats why it hurts me so much when the guy of my dreams vanishes in front of my eyes. because i give too much. mama told me not to put so much heart into it, but i fell right in, fell right through...
even though the odds are against me in this situation, even though the world is telling me to get back on my feet and forget the one who cant even keep my heart well, somethings telling me, my soul.. doesnt want to leave this all behind. cos theres no such thing as friends with ex-es. i know it myself. its a fucking scheme to make the breakup sound good.
maybe i will let it go.. i still cant decide. im still waiting for your message, for your phone call. until you do, i will be waiting...
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